


A Guide To Destroy A Soul Smoothly

by sokkaseyebrows



Category: The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: ???? - Freeform, Character Study, and they are kinda sad, kinda angsty, nothing too much, she's in deep thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 16:02:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17450033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sokkaseyebrows/pseuds/sokkaseyebrows
Summary: Reyna wasn't a lucky kid.And she needed a rest.





	A Guide To Destroy A Soul Smoothly

Reyna never considered herself as a lucky kid. Her mother was a goddess of war after all. The luxury called luck was unaffordable for a girl like her, a girl who lived in the battlefield. She was never lucky enough to have some decent, uneventful, and happy time.

_ What even is the point,  _ was what Reyna thought as she looked around.  _ What’s the reason of… all this? _

She swung her sword to a karpoi.  _ Why do I keep doing this? _

She turned around as the monster transformed into dust and mixed with the wind.  _ I have a miserable life and for what? More pain and loss? Will it ever stop, all this suffering? _

_ I want it to stop. _

_ I want to have some peace. _

_ I want a life. _

She felt the wind on her back, a bleak, sad wind it was, and as her nose greeted the scent of fresh blood and salty sweat, she realised how much she was sweating. Wind touched her sweat, she shivered.  _ I’m going to get a flu,  _ she thought _. This shit better be over soon or I swear to gods I will- _

_ What are you gonna do Reyna,  _ she interrupted her own thoughts,  _ moisturise them? _

Yeah, what was she going to do? Fight the gods? Oh, hell no, it has been tried before way too many times. Throughout history, half-bloods wanted gods pay for their own mistakes  _ for once, _ and all of the attempts to make that happen resulted… dreadfully. The consequences were beyond bearing: not only they have failed, but also caused damage to a great amount of people. The scents of the wind disappeared, she couldn’t smell anything for a moment, it was all empty. Her armour became a burden, the sword and shield felt heavy in her hands, she almost dropped them.

There was  _ nothing _ she could do. There was no way she, or any demigod, could stop these battles. They simply had to win this and prepare for the next one. It has always been like this and it was always going to be like this. Another wave of wind came from north and hit her face, this time it was warmer and weaker, brought the scent of strawberries hidden beneath the dewy petrichor of the first rain of spring. It felt like silk on her skin.

There were rules, to keep them safe and sound. She would follow the rules, she would  _ make _ the rules, to keep everyone safe. If there were rules, you’d follow them and everything would turn out fine at the end. She knew the rules were supposed to keep them all safe, as long as they were followed, yet here she was, following rules but still standing in the middle of a pile of bodies‒ bodies of her allies, soldiers,  _ friends _ . The smell of strawberries was quickly replaced by a scent that left a metallic taste on her mouth. Her whole body felt sticky and obnoxious.

Reyna never considered herself as a rebel, however she somehow found herself looking for an escape from this shithole.  _ If only I was granted a wish, _ she thought,  _ I would stop time, and run. _

All she ever asked was to be able to run from the monsters, both inner and outer ones.  _ I want to leave. I don’t care how much I have to run. I can run a whole week if it means that this will be over.  _ Wind blew from the east, strong, cold and hostile it was, almost felt like a slap in the face. Then the wind howled, as if it was yelling at her.

Reyna shoved down the thoughts as much as she could.  _ No,  _ she thought, _ I can’t. I have to stay and fight. For my friends, family, and the little kids. They don’t even know what to do when faced a monster. Focus and fight. _ Wind blew harder, filling her with grace, pride and strength so much that she couldn’t breathe normally. Her breaths were sharp, yet powerful.  _ Focus and fight. _

She repeated those words until she regained her focus. Then kept on fighting, as always.  _ Focus and fight.  _

The wind brought the strawberries back to her, this time hidden beneath the warmth of fire mixed with the safety of blankets.

If it weren’t for the people around her, Reyna would have fled already. But running away was a luxury she, or her friends could not afford, so she always stayed. Even at the times when she was already packed up, ready, and at the door of her room, Reyna still stayed. Never left her room, something,  _ this thing _ , always stopped her.

_ I need to catch my breath or else I will break.  _ The wind howled, and sounded like a typhoon. Her eyes itched and her bangs disturbed her.

Breaking down was another luxury she could never afford. She had to keep her face straight. Reyna was not allowed to show her panic, distress, agony, grief, rage‒ she was a leader, and for her team, she had to have a strong image even when she was at her lowest.  _ Those people look up to you, you inspire them.  _ She took a deep breath _. If you break down in front of them I will break your arm, _ she threatened herself,  _ before a monster breaks your neck, of course.  _ Wind let out a cry, and sounded like a mother who lost her child. Then it brought a familiar “friend” of Reyna’s, whom she encountered a lot in her life: smell of fresh blood and salty sweat. It felt like how it always felt like, muggy and greasy.

_ I’m gonna fucking kill myself,  _ she screamed with fury in her mind as she ran toward another karpoi,  _ I’m gonna fucking kill myself I swear. _ A headache came uninvited when she slayed that little demon. She let out a scream with exasperation.

“You okay there?” She glanced at the owner of the voice, it was Zhang, son of Mars, he was about 50 feet away from her. Reyna replied before blocking an arrow with her shield.

The wind howled one last time and it sounded like soldier who had lost everything: their pride, battle, friends, family.

“Everything’s fine.” 

Everything was not fine.

**Author's Note:**

> hey guys, gals and non binary pals, hope you enjoyed it! I would love to hear thougts have a nice day 💛


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